This is my 7th reading of the 7-Habits book. I read this as a text book and prepare to face the life exams. Further, rather than just learner, I also want to be teacher of the good learning by discussing the good things with friends and family.
I will not go into the jugglery of words and terms used, and would write simple English.
- First, the inside of you is the mirror through which you see the world, your thinking, experiences creates the views.
2. Second, to get the public victory, you must achieve private victory, which means control over yourself, by better understanding of self.
3. Maintain the balance of production and production capability, to become an overall winner.
4. Take the initiative:
I work as a Project Manager, and mantra after reading this book, that helped me a lot is: be proactive, take interest, and sell solution. A lot of time, you will feel, what is the point in providing unsolicited advice, and whether your protectiveness makes any impact. I also felt futility in the short term, and felt awkward, as I was a kind of person, who previously was not self driven, rather work on things that been assigned, and pushed to me. First advantage I got that I feel better and started finding the solutions. Second I am a kind of person, who always like to showcase my knowledge, and to be proactive I had to exercise my creative ingenuity, and exercise my mind and look for the gap and initiatives which can really provide value. There were some time, I felt am I being too verbose, or sending the information that may make feel people annoyed and I may be considers a nuisance.
However, sometimes I feel some people are really protective of what they are doing and there are others people who think they are smarter than others. Those people who think they are better than others try to find out the fault, and those who are protective would try not to share the full information, and would criticize your suggestion as either being lack of substance or irrelevant.
So, my experience would have been, do some research and try to find out the areas where you can fill the gap,or provide support where the other person is lacking. Other example that really worked for me to support the other person, or manager etc to make him look good. But be careful with manager and the people, who work as parasite and might would like to take credit for themselves.
I found being proactive has its advantages, it gives you credit of raising the issue at first, then start a trail be it email or chats, where you become part of the loop, and that way you can fish for others way of thinking and ideas, which improves your perspective.
I being a good engineer and somethings that naturally comes to me such as number and good memory, I have been able to significantly increase my Circle of Influence (COI), and people’s trust in my ability to help them which has outgrown my COI and reduced the COC (Concern).
Feeling of being left out
Being junior and person of color made me feel that people who are senior, bypass me from the email chains, and do not keep me in loop for the projects I am responsible. Further sometimes people have ego and other department try to short circuit the communication. Information is the key, and asserting and reminding people to keep in the loop is important. What helped me was that being part of the group email, whereby you receive all the communication, insist that people keep that group in the copy, every time they communicate. Continuous reminder that the group email is included in all the communication chain. Keep holistic and good knowledge of commercial and contractual relationship, and let people know they should get the letters reviewed before its being sent out, as there may be Contractual terms that need to be corresponded in the letter or emails that go out.
Transactional relationship works really well for me, I share the information proactively, and let people be assured that I am on top of the things.
Proactive in generating the work, and be a face or sales person for the good work that you or organisation is doing. Proactively identify the long term requirements and follow-up continuously.
DEGREE OF PRO-ACTIVITY
Proactive people focus on those things which they can contribute something and work in their circle of influence.
CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE
I found some people are not pro-active in asking for the support, thinking it might bring their weakness. Send unsolicited support, and soon you become part of the support structure. My pro-activeness made me an expert in many area, e.g IT support, Plant Control software, and I was de-facto made part of the steering committee, which frankly speaking few months ago, I had no clue about.
At the very heart of COI is the Integrity, that means to deliver on promises made.
Direct Control vs indirect Control:
Focus on things which you have direct control over. Like controlling how to write emails, controlling your wastage to improve the effectiveness. People have tendency of thinking you as gofer, but giving unsolicited advice, but of good quality, sooner of later increases your incluence. Here is Gandhi’s quote, “ First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, and then you win”
Take any problem: break down it into direct & indirect control part, and then work on direct control part.
**** HABIT #2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND ******
It is important you keep the end in the mind. What matter most gets buried under layers of pressing problems and immediate concerns and outward behaviors. |End in Mind| keeps you on track and aligned to your long-term goal.
Funeral experience: Imagine you are on deathbed, and people surrounding describing you. Imagine what how would you like to be described, and to achieve that perception, what you have to do?
Visual in great details: 10–15–20 years from now, retirement etc.
Case 2: Principle of “all things are created twice” mental and physical. From my own case study, since I procrastinate, I get assigned by others to do work, and become part of their agenda.
To be driven my own doings, following steps I will follow:
- Start with “a personal mission statement” call it a your personal constitution, which helps in the decision making in dilemma, activity trap and keep you on track in daily life.
- Remember we detect rather than invent our missions in life. our conscience give us and an awareness of our uniqueness.
- Break the mission statements into : Professional goal, personal goal (as husband, as son, etc..)
- Identify my center, look closely your life support factors, and find a clear center from which you derive high degree of security, guidance and wisdom.
*** HABIT 3: Putting first thing first ****
Organize and execute around your priorities
Challenge is not to mange time but ourselves
satisfaction = f (expectation, realization)